Petroleum Products Hate Me and My Children

So you may notice that this is the second post today. If I stay on target, it should be 2 out of 3. Or maybe 4. But that is a big IF. This is what happens when you are too busy to post, you have to play catch up while you are supposed to be working...

About a week ago, I had one of those moments. Yes THOSE moments. When deep down you know you should be paying more attention to a child that is being entirely too quiet. But instead, you have stupidly convinced yourself that he must have fallen asleep. Wyatt was in his car seat behind me on the way home from dinner. 5 minutes. It's not like we had to drive from one end of Dallas to the other. He did his damage in less then 5 minutes! I opened the car door to find that he had squeezed out an entire tube of Vaseline mostly into his hair!

Do you know how hard it is to get Vaseline out of hair? The first wash didn't do it. We basically just spread it to the rest of his hair. And added a fine slimy layer all over the bathtub. Tilex got it off the bathtub, but I thought that probably wasn't such a good idea to spray directly on the kid. I turned to my best internet friend, google. Google told me to use cornstarch. I said, Cornstarch? Are you sure google? He insisted.

It didn't work. Unless, of course, google was attempting to make a giant mess in my bathroom. Then it did work. Splendidly. But it did Not get the Vaseline out of Wyatt's beautiful blond hair. And cornstarch mixed with Vaseline actually makes a quite smelly paste. That Tilex does not remove.

His hair is completely dry in this picture. That is all Vaseline. Don't ask about the duct tape in the background...

I was eventually able to remove some of it with regular, non-messy, no drama dish washing soap. And the rest wore off after about 3 baths. Google failed.

But this was not to be the end of my hate-hate relationship with petroleum. Or google. Greg decided to take Ethan to a movie. On the way, he had to stop and get gas. (can you see where this might be headed?)

Now, when I have children with me and I have to stop to get gas, they stay in the car. You know, away from all the stinky dirty gas pumps, puddles of who knows what, and moving vehicles. But Greg likes to take his chances. Ethan was standing on one side of the gas hose and wanted to go to the other side. So he ducked under. Or attempted to, at least. His head came up too early and knocked the nozzle out of the hole, basically creating a gushing gasoline fountain. Greg, in an admitted moment of dumbassness, tried to put the nozzle back in the hole. Without clicking off that little locking feature that was letting gas spew Everywhere. They did not make it to the movie, but came home so that they could spread their gassyness all over my house. They Wreaked!

So google, how do you get gas out of clothes? Because two wash cycles with vinegar did not do it. You soak them in Coca-Cola, of course. Duh.